'She threw out a part of you': Internet supports woman who refuses to forgive stepmother's 'horrific' act
Several people have offered their support in response to a woman's admission that she is unable to forgive her stepmother for getting rid of her late mother's possessions. The daughter admitted to having depression and even considering dropping out of a prestigious college, which confused her about continuing to hold out on forgiving her stepmother.
The woman decided to share her concern on the Reddit AITA discussion forum in order to clear up the confusion and gain a better understanding. The post was titled 'AITA for not forgiving my stepmother for throwing away my late mom's possessions?' by the user with the handle u/throawaydaughteroks. She revealed that her mother had died at the age of 23, almost ten years ago, and that her father, who is 49 years old, had remarried the stepmother, with whom she had never had a strong relationship, more than 9 years ago.
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'Not one thing was left'
The woman wrote in the post, "I missed my mom like crazy and would try to talk to my stepmother about her, but she didn’t seem interested. Every time my mother was mentioned, she’d stop engaging in conversation and just go on her phone or walk away."
The woman claimed that her grandmother had told her that she was "creating something special" as a birthday present for her when she turns 18 years old. She wrote, "I asked for a hint, and she said it had to do with someone I missed a lot. That night, I cried a lot. I knew she was going to create something to do with my mother."
The terrible news, however, followed, as she noted, "A while after that, my dad called me. He said he had bad news while sniffling. He said that my stepmother threw away all my mom’s possessions. Not one thing was left. Not even sentimental items. I started crying, and my dad comforted me over the phone and then started crying with me."
The woman certainly didn't handle the news well as she wrote, "I know you aren’t supposed to make major decisions when you are emotional because it can lead to reckless behavior. But I was so mad and sad that I decided to drive to my dad's house."
The woman wrote, "My grandmother opened the door, but I just walked past her. I went straight to my stepmother. I started yelling at her, calling her something along the lines of jealous and vindictive. B***h. I said a lot of vile words. I told her I never wanted to talk to her again. She tried to apologize, but I just blocked out everything she was saying. I ignored what everyone was saying and just left."
The woman afterward questioned whether she should begin to forgive her stepmother as she wrote, "Since then, my half brother was born. I have nothing against him, but I barely visit him. My dad forgave my stepmother, but I can’t. My family recently had a get-together and asked if I would be coming. I asked if my stepmother would be there, and my aunt said yes. I then declined."
"My aunt told me to get over her throwing away my mom’s possessions and be there for my half brother. My cousins and other aunts and uncles have since messaged me to say similar stuff and have been really pressuring. I almost dropped out of my top-tier college due to being depressed, but I feel like they might have a point. So AITA?" the woman concluded.
'Do not allow your family to enable this vile woman'
Many people have offered constructive comments on the post in support of the woman's choice to forgo forgiving her stepmother. One person wrote, "NTA - Do not allow your family to enable this vile woman. If they want to pick a stranger over their own blood that's their choice, cut out whoever you need."
Another person wrote, "NTA Why would she even do that? That's pretty horrific, especially knowing that a child who lost a parent holds on to that memory so strongly. The real question though is how your father could stay with a woman that would do something like that to his child."
A third person wrote, "NTA. If she cut off your arm, would they still make you see her? She threw out a part of you, that you can never get back. You will have to live with that loss for the rest of your life. I am so, so sorry. I hope you feel better and surround yourself with people who love you and don’t undervalue your pain."
Several others disagreed with the woman's decision to drop out of college as one person wrote, "NTA, don't drop out of college for one!!! But I don't think being around your stepmom is going to make you less depressed either. You don't have to get over it. You don't even have to be there for your half brother!"
Another person wrote, "NTA. Put yourself first because no one in your family is or will." This other person wrote, "NTA I have no nice word to say about your stepmother. You are not in the wrong. Your relatives can keep their comments to themselves."
This article contains remarks made on the Internet by individual people and organizations. MEAWW cannot confirm them independently and does not support claims or opinions being made online.