Grandmother's bold stand wins hearts as Internet backs her refusal to support step-grandchildren
Losing a family member has irreparable repercussions on the family, and one Redditor has gone on to detail their experience of the same on Reddit’s AITA platform. The user, a grandmother, has revealed that she lost her daughter Joy a decade ago and that she left behind a husband and two children who are now teenagers. The grandmother reveals that in her last days, her daughter had asked her parents to stay in their grandchildren’s lives so they would not forget her- she had apparently feared being replaced by another woman. She also asked for her parents to leave whatever they have to her children.
However, the husband had gone on to bring his new wife into their home eight months after Joy’s death. This new wife had a child with someone else and was also pregnant with another child. “At that point he did attempt to make it a package deal where we could not see our grandchildren without treating his now stepchildren as our grandchildren and that we were to treat all future children of his the same. Otherwise we would need to be cut out to give our grandchildren the chance to form the new family bonds without interference from us,” the poster said. She also went on to say that he believed his children deserved another chance with a mother and to consider her children as their siblings.
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‘Grandchildren were glad to see us’
The grandmother did not appreciate the idea of being cut off from her grandchildren by a father who didn’t even wait a year to replace their daughter, leading her to get legal counsel. “Their lawyer told them we would have a case to get grandparents visitation. We also sought advice on if we were denied access, if we could obtain that. We were told given our close relationship with the children it would be easy to get access through the courts. This led to us getting minimal access,” she said.
In the last few years, the man seems to have become estranged from his own family, and his wife’s family as well- he now has 6 children apart from the poster’s grandchildren, all of them dependent on their parents for support. The poster then went on to say, “Now that my grandchildren are teenagers they seek to spend more time with us and their lives have benefitted from it. We admittedly spoil them more than some would like because of the circumstances but they are wonderful children.”
However, it seems that the husband has a problem with his other children not receiving the same support and had a few choice words to offer to the poster, who said, “I did not owe his children anything, and that I would never forgive him for what he attempted to do before.” In response, the father told her that she was “cold hearted and callous.”
The verdict is out!
Users have shared support for the poster, all of whom think it was callous of the man to replace his dead wife with a pregnant woman less than a year after her death. “Who the fuck moves in their gf 8 months after their wife dies? I feel bad for the other kids cause it sounds like their parents are awful but thats not your problem,” one user said.
Another user had said that the gravity of the situation was largely influenced by the fact that there were children involved. “It would be fine if he didn’t have children. Especially if the illness that killed the wife was long or they knew it was coming. But with kids? They are still grieving. Even introducing a GF before a year would be a LOT. Let alone getting engaged and moving in a new wife.”
Another user made sure to remind everyone of the fact that the deceased wife had these worries long before her death, implying that there may have been more to this than what meets the eye. “With your daughter being so concerned that he would attempt to “replace” her in her children’s eyes, and push for them forgetting her, then I can only imagine what could’ve happened to make her feel like that. No, it isn’t the new children’s fault, but you also aren’t actively trying to hurt them. You’re taking care of your grandchildren,” the user said.
Another user slammed the father and his wife for not recognizing their own faults. “You would think Daddy dearest would stop and realize that if he and his wife are estranged from his family and her family, that he and his wife are the problem? They must be real nightmares,” the user said.