Internet slams ‘toxic’ wife who banned ‘weak’ husband from watching son’s birth

The man said that his wife was adamant that he did not enter the delivery room

PUBLISHED MAR 23, 2023

A man revealed that his wife did not allow him to see his son's birth and when he felt sad she told him to be a man and get over it (Representational picture, Getty Images)

Netizens expressed solidarity with a man and slammed his wife after she forbade him from witnessing the birth of their son, leaving him extremely depressed. The scenario was discussed on the 'AITA' forum on Reddit. It was narrated by a user named u/Dear_Fox_5010. The discussion has garnered over 15,000 upvotes and more than 6,000 comments.

In the Reddit post titled 'AITA for “sulking” about the fact that my wife won’t let me watch my son’s birth?' the Redditor wrote, "I, 28M, have been with the love of my life, Emily, 26F, for 7 years, married for 2. We have always talked about having kids, and I’ve always wanted to be there when they were born. When my dad was still alive, he used to tell me and my siblings all the time about how it literally brought him to tears (NOT a man who cries btw), and he would say he was so grateful for all of us and for the experience."

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'She’s very adamant '

The man further wrote, "My beautiful and amazing wife is 8 months pregnant. It’s been a pretty difficult pregnancy for her, well for us, but especially to her. She’s had a few miscarriages in the past, and I’ve just been praying to God for both of them to make it through safely."

The man wrote how his wife does not want him to be in the labor room which left him sad. "We were talking more and more about what’s going to happen when she goes into labor, and she’s very adamant that I not be in the room, natural or C, no matter what. I’ve tried convincing, pleading, begging, but she won’t change her mind. Her mom is going to be with her, and I understand that she needs her mom, and that she needs to do whatever to make sure that everything goes smoothly. I don’t wanna stress her out too much because I keep telling myself all that matters is that they’re both healthy, but I’m honestly really sad about not being able to be there for my son’s birth," he wrote.

'All that matters is that they’re both healthy'

Soon, the man reveals something very disconcerting about the wife. "It’s not about me. I know that. All that matters is that they’re both healthy. I’ve been trying to come to terms and understand this on my own time, so as not to bother her, but Emily’s just being so condescending to me, and I know that she’s just stressed out and scared, so she doesn’t mean it, but I feel like I deserve to process this at least for a few days. I still do everything as I’ve done before, but she says that now I have this 'beaten puppy dog' look on my face, and its 'pissing her off,'" he wrote.

He continued, "Then, she started scolding me asking me why it mattered so much to me, and if I was going to act this weak in front of our son. She told me I needed to just be a f*****g man and 'get the f**k over it.' I feel like crying, but I don’t want her to know, and get mad at me again, so I told her I was going out to get groceries, and am writing this in the car to try and calm myself down. I love her so much, but what she said really hit me hard. I just want them both to be healthy and safe, but I also wanted to be there."

'Cruel and toxic'

Many Reddit users supported the man calling Emily's actions and "toxic." A user wrote, "NTA It's your child, too. I don't blame you one bit for being upset. You're not an AH for wanting to see the birth of your kid. 'if I was going to act this weak in front of our son. She told me I needed to just be a f*****g man and “get the f**k over it.' Your wife is easily an AH from these sentences alone. Being pregnant doesn't give her a free pass to be verbally abusive."

Another questioned, "Is she always this cruel and misogynistic? NTA," while another agreed and replied, "Not misogynistic, straight up obsessed with toxic masculinity. Men are weak if they cry or care about seeing their child’s first moments? Hell no this woman has very toxic views and op really needs to take a look if this is the kind of mindset he wants his child to be raised with."

Another person wrote, "I thought OP was handling it like a champ. He’s allowed to have his own feelings about this decision and to be sad about it! In the end of the day it really is up to the person who is having the medical procedure who is there, but knowing you’re not going to be there for your wife and your child is heartbreaking. He’s not denying it’s her right to decide that, but she’s being down right cruel. Marriage don’t survive this level of casual cruelty and I hope OP comes to realize he deserves to be treated so much better."

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