Internet slams man for choice of attire during first meeting with girlfriend's parents
Netizens slammed a user on an AITA forum on Reddit for wearing an Iron Maiden T-shirt for his first meeting with his girlfriend's parents. The scenario is described by a user named u/Relevant_Rip_2674, who has gained 11.3K upvotes and 5400 plus comments from the users.
AITA discussions have become one of the most popular opinion forums on Reddit recently. The post explains, "I (28m) have been dating my girlfriend (23f) for a few months. Things have gone well; we get along well so far and I really care about her and hope things work out with us."
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What does the post indicate?
The post added, "Anyway she recently invited me to come over and have dinner with her parents at their home. She still lives with them for now. We are getting more serious and they wanted to meet me. If it's relevant her parents are Indian immigrants to the US and I am white." It also claimed, "So, I thought it was a completely casual meeting and I wore an Iron Maiden T-shirt. I do happen to like the band but that's not even why I wore it; that's just how I dress and that shirt just happened to be clean that day. I went and met her parents and thought we'd had a good meeting."
Later, he claimed, "However my girlfriend is NOT happy with me. She feels as if me dressing in a T-Shirt rather than a nicer button-up shirt was bad enough, but that wearing a shirt with skulls on it was--in her words--"just obnoxious." I honestly just dressed for the meeting the way I usually do and didn't even think about it. I think that if she had certain standards that she should have communicated them to me beforehand. But she thinks that what I did was "obviously stupid and inappropriate" and that I should have known better. Is she right or is she being too critical?"
' YTA Because you're an adult'
The users slammed the boy for his approach toward meeting his girlfriend's parents. A user said, " YTA Because you're an adult... meeting someone's parents generally isn't an overly casual thing unless they specify that their parents are casual as well. Surely you own a nicer shirt than an Iron Maiden tshirt, being an adult and all."
Another added, "This is the entire problem. He didn't think about it. Meeting the parents of someone who you are seriously dating IS SOMETHING THAT YOU SHOULD THINK ABOUT. I don't think it's just her. I think everyone would want the person they are dating to care about meeting their parents* for the first time. *(If someone isn't close with their parents or doesn't have parents this might be substituted with another relative or found family or a dear friend. Whoever that person is, I think everyone would want their partner to care enough to think about how they present themselves)." "My friends oldest daughter just brought a boy home for the first time last November. He wore a dress shirt and nice slacks and was overly polite and formal. The whole family absolutely cracked through his anxiety but for those initial meetings it's nice to show he cared and they're still together. My friend and his wife adore the kid, because he put in effort. Something OP doesn't seem to get," explained a user.
"OP seems to be trying to pass this off as a cultural difference. Her parents being Indian immigrants and the imagery of the band Iron Maiden have nothing to do with it though. “Come over for dinner and meet my parents” means put in a modicum of effort. Put on a shirt with buttons and a collar. Grab a bouquet or bottle of wine. If OP were 18, this would be whatever but 28 is way too old not to understand such a basic cultural norm," read a comment. "Seriously, if I was meetings a partner's parents for the first time and they were from a different culture I would be asking her what there expectations of me were. Should I bring them each a gift? What should I wear? Are there any traditions or taboos I should be aware of? Even if they are from the same culture I would at least be asking what hobbies does Dad have, what does your mom do that she is super proud of so I can compliment her on it," wrote a user.
A comment stated, "Plus... he's 28 f**ing years old!!! What in the actual f**k! To say grow up is the LEAST of the responses and tough love this kid needs to hear at this point. You cannot be this unaware of life at almost 30 dude." "I’ve read research that says it takes 7 subsequent good impressions to make up for one bad first impression. OP has some work ahead of him. Except he seems to have shown that he doesn’t want to put in any effort. OP, YTA. At 28, you shouldn’t need advice on this. The message you sent was that you didn’t care what your GF’s parents think. Which by extension says you don’t care overly much about your GF. Please do some serious reflecting.Edit: how little attention have you been paying to your girlfriend, if you didn’t already know what her standards are?" said another.
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