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'Need to keep YOUR peace': Internet backs woman who no longer wants to be her sister's bridesmaid

The woman backed out after learning that her sister had asked a woman to be a bridesmaid who she was not comfortable with
PUBLISHED MAR 15, 2023
(Representational Image/ Getty Images)
(Representational Image/ Getty Images)

Internet is siding with a woman who no longer wants her sister to be her bridesmaid. The original poster, who goes by u/Legal_Archer8590, shared the scenario in popular Reddit forum 'Am I The A**hole?', where it received more than 1000 upvotes and over 200 comments.

In the Reddit Post titled "WIBTA if I told my sister I would no longer be her bridesmaid?" In a post, the 30-year-old lady narrated the ordeal, noting that it was her sister's wedding with the groom who belonged to the same friend circle of her ex-boyfriend, "I F30 have history with groom, we had the same friendship group in early teens and twenty(my sister did not knows them). This friendship group imploded, when I had to take my ex (ex is not the groom) to court for a number of reasons reddit will not allow me to post. (I won in court and have restraining order)."

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'F1 would repeatedly harass me'

The original poster further elaborated on how chaotic her relationship with her ex was and how no one took her side during that time, thus causing mental challenges for her. "During this time I suffered from ptsd and anorexia, it took a long time to rebuild my life. Some of the group took his side and were not happy I was taking it to court. F1 would repeatedly harass me blocking my car in, threatening me and turn up where I was, including my house at all hours of the night. In the end I had to tell her, I would also take her to court if she did not back off," she said.

The story took a bizarre turn when she learned the F1 was also going to be a bridesmaid at her sister's wedding, "The wedding is this year I was asked to be bridesmaid and happily accepted. 6 months later I see a post that my sister has asked F1 to be a bridesmaid (she is still friends with groom). I feel disrespected and that I do not feel comfortable with this person. Please note the bridal party was meant to get ready at my house and there's no way F1 is setting foot in my house. I don't want to be bridesmaid but my parents say I should keep the peace. I will still go to the wedding and support my sister, but want nothing to do with f1. I am not asking my sister to choose, just that I want to back out as bridesmaid. So WIBTA for breaking the peace?"

'You need to keep YOUR peace'

The Reddit users supported the woman's decision, while one wrote, "NTA. No, no, no. After everything you've been through I can't believe this. Hold firm and look after yourself." Another added, "OP, you need to keep YOUR peace. Definitely NTA"

Reddit
Reddit

Another supportive user chimed in, "NTA. Allowing someone into your home who harassed you in the past in what sounds like retaliation in a violent situation is not keeping the peace. Quietly and respectfully removing yourself from the situation entirely is the most mature option and would be “keeping the peace” (though OP should not have to be responsible for that.) I’ve said this in a number of threads before, but the person being asked to “keep the peace” is almost never the one threatening it."

Reddit

Someone wrote in the comments, "NTA “My parents say I should keep the peace.” You stepping down IS you keeping the peace. Having read some of your comments and the way your sister and mother seem to put F1 first, I’d be reconsidering attending at all, but you have to make the call you’re comfortable with. Wishing you all the best."

Reddit
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