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'She would kiss my neck and touch me': 'Teen Mom' Leah Messer reveals how babysitter sexually abused her at 5

'I was afraid that if I told her to stop, she wouldn’t want to hang out and play games anymore,' she said
UPDATED APR 11, 2020
Leah Messer (Getty Images)
Leah Messer (Getty Images)

In a shocking revelation, 'Teen Mom 2' star Leah Messer opened up about how she faced sexual harassment during her childhood. In an excerpt from her upcoming memoir, 'Hope, Grace & Faith', she said a babysitter sexually abused her when she was barely five or six years old. 

In an exclusive reveal by The Sun, the 27-year-old shed light on a teenager who watched her during her mother's hospital shifts. While she first thought the babysitter was the "coolest person," trouble started brewing shortly afterward. She wrote in her book, “Sometimes she would chase me and try to kiss me, and I would have to run away and hide. I really wanted her to like me, but at the same time, she made me feel weird and uncomfortable.”

She then said the babysitter “started laying down” with her at naptime and briefed about the entire incident saying, “She would put on a movie and as soon as her mother left the room, she would kiss my neck and touch me where no one should ever touch a child. I didn’t like what she was doing. It felt wrong, but she was the only one in that house that was nice to us. I was afraid that if I told her to stop, she wouldn’t want to hang out and play games anymore.”

The ordeal went on for “at least six months" until her family moved to North Carolina. Opening up about her struggle to come to terms with it, she said she never told anyone because she “felt ashamed,” like she had “done something wrong.”

Leah Messer (Getty Images)

Putting it at the back of her head, she “stuffed the memory down so deep as if it never happened,” but she also said how it became another loose stone in the foundation of her self-esteem. “It took a long time for me to find my voice because I didn’t know how to love myself enough to say no.”

The incident left her in a dark place and she first spoke about the sexual abuse on Instagram Live in March. She said, “Everything I endured in my childhood from sexual abuse to physical abuse was probably the hardest thing.” 

In another exclusive by The Sun, Leah's battle with drugs was highlighted. It all began at the age of two when her mom filed for divorce from her dad because of his drug addiction. In her book, she wrote, “I was totally miserable. The sad thing is, I actually liked school. I loved learning new things and I craved the structure—which I didn’t have at home. I hated always being the new kid. Every time I had to start over it chipped away at my self-esteem, and I retreated into myself a little bit more.”

The struggle continued even in her later years, especially during her labor in 2013 following a “botched” spinal tap. She was given heavy painkiller dosage with Hydrocodone, Oxycodone and Tylenol 3 for “intense” spinal headaches. She also claimed Diazepam for her anxiety “knocked her out.” Moreover, she also opened up about how she “blacked out” for years, and often fell asleep midway. Her struggle with anxiety first came into notice when 'Teen Mom 2' producers came across a GoPro footage of her attempt to suicide. Read more about her life and personal struggles once the book releases on May 5.

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