Rumer Willis lost her virginity at 18 to an older man who ‘took advantage’ of her: 'I didn't say yes'
The eldest daughter of Bruce Willis and Demi Moore, Rumer Willis, revealed some secrets about herself while appearing on Jada Pinkett Smith’s ‘Red Table Talk’ show. The episode was recorded pre-pandemic and saw guests Rumer, Slut Walk founder and women’s rights activist Amber Rose and former NFL player DeAndre Levy participating in discussions about sexual consent along with hosts Jada Pinkett, Adrienne Banfield-Norris, and Willow Smith.
At one point in the conversation, Rumer candidly shared that she had sex for the first time when she was 18 and was taken “advantage” of by an older man. “When I lost my virginity, when I was 18, I was more concerned with the shame that I was feeling at not having done it. I was not abused or wasn't raped... but I didn't say yes. I wasn't gung-ho about it. But I also didn't say no. I just let it happen. He was older and took advantage, and didn't check in. That's where I feel like the man's responsibility is. No means no, but what if you can't say no?" she said.
In addition to losing virginity, Rumer also talked about being judged as a teenager for her looks. She said: "I would get myself into a situation, and at some point I had learned that if someone wants, values me sexually, or I feel like they desire me, then they are entitled to me. When I was like 14, because I was so shamed when all those blogs came out about how I looked, how my face looked, then my idea was that, 'Oh, well then, if I'm desired sexually, then I have value.'" Jada Pinkett also agreed with her and added, “Now, I have to be honest with you. I went through that stage too, because I was always so petite. I wasn't always 'the girl'... You know, I did get caught up in that a little bit."
This comes after in September Rumer shared bold pictures of herself in a BDSM-themed photoshoot while demanding an end to the policing of women’s bodies. ‘The House Bunny’ star worked with photographer Tyler Shields and posed boldly for a number of photos for a series called ‘Bondage’. In one of her snaps, she was seen donning a latex bodysuit and thigh-high boots while her hair was done in a sleek updo. Another picture of her showed her wearing nothing but the boots, tied up with a black rope while kneeling on the floor. Rumer posted the snaps on her Instagram with a message that read: “This series I created with Tyler is about reclaiming the female form. Whether clothed or not, as women our bodies are constantly policed and dictated over by men and by other women. We are told what we can and cannot wear based on our size and shape or others beliefs about what is acceptable or appropriate. We are told what we need to look like to be considered beautiful.”
"We are told our sexuality and expression of that sexuality is something we should ashamed of, something we should keep to ourselves. We are persecuted for our right to choose when to become a mother, or to become one at all. We are kept from access to birth control, places to get information about sexual health and contraceptives are defunded. The lineage of women who have fought with their lives to progress women’s rights sacrificed everything to get us to where we are today and we are still miles away from any sort of equality. My body and my right to my divine femininity will not be policed or suppressed by anyone... man or woman,” Rumer added.
