'Becoming': Michelle's whirlwind romance with Barack Obama and how she knew 'he was a tsunami' coming after her
Graduated from Harvard University, Michelle Obama was in her 20s when she started practicing law. She was focused on making a difference in her life when out of nowhere came a young man with a peculiar name whom she was asked to mentor. That young man was Barack Obama.
"I had to call him on the phone," Michelle said of her first exchange with Obama. "This is when I first got a hint that there might be a little something more there. He said 'Hello!' and he had this 'Barack Obama voice' that didn't match the nerdy image in my head and I was like 'Woah!' The heat was coming out of the phone, from that voice."
She recalled how he was late on the first day. "He was late and I thought 'trifling black man late on the first day'. Then he showed up and flashed a smile and said, 'Oh, I'm so sorry I am late. I wasn't equipped with an umbrella."
Michelle was instantly in awe of him and said: "Okay" as she glanced at the secretaries who were looking at him appreciatively. She said the first thought that came to her mind was "we have to get him in the office."
The former first lady recalled that nearly a month after their meeting Obama asked her out on a date, but she did not approve of engaging in a romantic relationship with her advisee and conforming to the stereotype of being a "black couple".
Inevitable stereotypes
"He asked me out probably a month after meeting, but he was my advisee. I was like 'we are not dating'," she recalled. "That would be so tacky, the two black people from Harvard. That's just what they were waiting for. 'You guys love each other, don't you? You're black, he's black. This will be great'."
The pair, despite Michelle's initial reluctance, quickly became close. The former attorney recalled how different Obama was from the others and how he often challenged her.
"He was very different from the very beginning and he was different from me," she said. "He challenged me in different ways. I knew he was a tsunami coming after me and if I don't get my act together, I would be swept up. I did not want to be an appendage to his dreams. That forced me to work and think and make decisions like leaving law."
Michelle strived to be equal to Obama and had to become confident enough where she could match his opinionated persona.
"My relationship with Barack was all about partnership," she said. "If I was going to have an equal voice with this very opinionated man, I had to get myself up, set myself off to a place where I was confident I was going to be his equal."
However, the pair's equation changed when they had children, two daughters: Malia and Sasha. Michelle said that she was frustrated that she had to sacrifice her aspirations and dreams to take care of the family.
"Something had to give. I had to give up my aspirations and dreams, not because he asked me to, but I felt like I couldn't do all of this," she said. "So I had to tone down my aspirations, I had to dial it back."
Marital counseling
The couple, going through a tough period in their relationship, also resorted to marital counseling to alleviate the rising tensions, and it helped them, according to Michelle. The former attorney said that she had built resentment towards Obama as she believed he was prioritizing himself.
"My resentment towards him was that Barack was prioritizing himself, in a way. We had babies and he was at the gym," she said. "I was like 'how do you find time to work out?'" She revealed that counseling assisted her in getting a perspective. "I had to let me stop getting mad at him for going to the gym and let me get to the gym."
"It helped me look at how I could take control of my own happiness within my marriage," she said while talking about counseling. "It's hard. It's hard blending two lives together."
The Netflix documentary 'Becoming' premieres on May 6.
