'Matilda' star Mara Wilson recounts the horrors of being sexualized as a child actress
NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK: Mara Wilson has spoken candidly about the terrible effects of being sexualized as a child actor. Wilson discussed the difficulties of reaching worldwide fame at a young age in her new memoir 'Good Girls Don't', which is available on Scribd.
The actress, now 35, first gained fame in 1993 when she was cast as Natalie 'Nattie' Hillard in 'Mrs Doubtfire'. She was six at the time. Before that, she had only appeared in a few television advertisements. She later played Susan Walker in 'Miracle on 34th Street', and in 1996, she played Matilda Wormwood in 'Matilda'. Wilson claims that as a young girl, she was exposed to unsafe situations, and when she got older, men started inappropriately approaching her and "sexualizing" her. Her memoir explores the pressures she faced as a child star and the complicated relationships that influenced her as she grew up in Hollywood.
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'Sketchy' incidents on set
Wilson, whose mother Suzie died from cancer in 1995 when she was eight years old, says that she was well cared for by her parents on the set of the movies, but she also alleges that some 'sketchy' things transpired, like her supervisors asking her to work overtime without first getting her parents' approval.
Wilson said of her mother, "If she didn't like the way that something was going, she would not hesitate to make her concerns known," according to Guardian. She claims that her parents believed she would be safe if she exclusively worked on children's movies, and blames society for sexualizing her.
'I made the mistake of Googling myself when I was 12'
Wilson said, "I had people sending me inappropriate letters and posting things about me online. I made the mistake of Googling myself when I was 12 and saw things that I couldn't unsee," according to Guardian. Wilson's head was cropped onto the bodies of other women in photos that were posted on porn websites.
Wilson said, "I don't think you can be a child star without there being some kind of lasting damage. The thing that people assume is that Hollywood is inherently corrupt, and there's something about being on film sets that destroys you. For me, that was not necessarily true. I always felt safe on film sets."
Wilson said, "There were definitely some sketchy, questionable things that happened at times – adults that told dirty jokes, or sexually harassed people in front of me. People who did things like ask me if it was OK if I worked overtime, instead of asking my parents, but I never felt unsafe. I think that's because I worked with a lot of really wonderful directors."
Pressure of childhood fame took its toll
Wilson felt that people expected her to be flawless, which she wasn't if she was having a terrible day, especially while she was grieving her mother's loss, according to DailyMail. She felt like she could no longer be herself when out in public.
Wilson shared that she was also aware of "the narrative" of young celebrities going off track, which, in her opinion, is somewhat unavoidable when children are dealing with so much pressure while trying to develop and find their own identities.
Wilson, however, did not descend into drinking, doing drugs, or partying, but she claimed that her anger turned destructive and took the shape of self-hatred. She claimed that she told herself, "You're a loser, you're a failure, you're ugly," and she appeared to be easily irritated and angry, according to DailyMail.
'If you're not beautiful, you're worthless'
Wilson's career slowed down as she got closer to adolescence. A director once asked her to wear a sports bra to help flatten her developing breasts, according to DailyMail. She said, "If you're not beautiful, you're worthless," adding that she immediately linked that to the end of her career. She said she was affected for a long time by the fact that she was no longer viewed as "cute" in Hollywood.
A psychiatrist eventually determined that Wilson had OCD and that she might also have post-traumatic stress disorder. Later, she started to embrace her sexuality, coming out as bisexual in 2016. She claimed to have seen this as a separate issue that she had attempted to ignore since she felt she had too much else going on at the time.
Where is Mara Wilson now?
Wilson claims she doesn't know what movie executives would do with a "short, curvy, Jewish brunette," and she is unsure if she would ever return to film or television. She said, "I don’t want anybody telling me, 'You need to lose 30lb and get a nose job,'" according to Daily Mail. She claims she no longer aspires to live up to Hollywood's expectations and that she now defines herself by "my own goals, my own relationships, and my own life," adding she is no longer interested in changing.
Wilson was raised in California and worked her way through a performing arts boarding school where she developed a love for writing and theater before continuing on to New York University. She is now mostly a writer after releasing 'Where Am I Now? True Stories of Girlhood and Accidental Fame', another memoir in 2016, and continues to do voiceover work and host the fiction podcast 'Welcome to Night Vale'.