Internet backs 'selfish' woman for refusing to cancel honeymoon over 'emergency' in husband's family
Every newlywed couple values their honeymoon as a time to focus solely on each other before beginning their new life together. What happens if a family incident forces it to be cut-short? This was yet another novel setting for a post uploaded on the well-known AITA Reddit community, leaving users perplexed for sometime. The newlywed poster was on her honeymoon with her 32-year-old husband when she apparently refused to let him return home since his brother's wife and child were involved in a car accident and were sent to the hospital. The husband, though, "wasn't having any of it and called her selfish."
The user wrote "My husband (m32) and I (f24) just got married a three weeks ago and we are currently celebrating our honeymoon. The plan was to travel for two months for different countries of Europe, Asia and Africa. We currently are in Spain and we are supposed to take a plane to Morocco in two days. However my husband wants to cut the trip short and go back to our home now." She went on to narrate the situation, "The thing is his brother is in a horrible situation, his wife and daughter had a car crash and they're on the hospital. The kid is fine but his wife has to be a little longer in the hospital, that's all I know."
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He labelled her 'selfish'
The user added, "I told my husband that I understand he wants to support his brother but that he's not a doctor so he can't do anything to help really. And his brother's wife is fine, she probably only has a broken leg or something and that's why she needs some more days in the hospital. I told him to just call his brother and ask to talk with his wife so he can send her his best wishes and that's all that he can do honestly. His parents and his in laws are helping with the kids so there's really nothing they need help in. I told him our honeymoon was important because it's a time for ourselves to enjoy and spend together."
But instead of considering any of the advice his wife offered, he labelled her "selfish" and kicked her out from their hotel room. She had to request a different room until he decided to let her in. Then the husband told her to continue the trip on her own. "He told me that he's leaving tomorrow because he needs to be supportive of his brother and told me I can continue the trip by myself. But that's not the point of s honeymoon at all, I told him so and he said that if he would've known how bitchy I was he would've never dated me. Am I really wrong here?" she wrote.
Verdict is in
The wife was initially referred to as YTA and ESH by the majority of redditors on the platform, but they later contended that the context wasn't clear enough for them. So they went on and declared that she was actually NTA. One confused user wrote, "EDIT: I take it all back. This is completely a NTA situation. OP just replied that her husband is REFUSING to disclose the condition of his SIL because OP "doesn't need to know and he doesn't want to discuss it with her". Yeah, now I know why a 30-year-old married someone in their early 20s, much easier to control. No woman his age would put up with that bullshit.
EDIT 2: OP has just said that her husband doesn’t “allow” her to be in the room when he calls his family to get updates, so doesn’t even know anything beyond “SIL and niece where in a car accident”. Absolutely unhinged behavior from this guy."
Another user agreed and wrote, "TBH the husband won’t give OP specific details when she asks and won’t even let her in the room when he gets updates. She should put that in the OP but with the age gap and the fact they only dated 6 months before getting married, I have to wonder if this accident happened at all. He threw his own wife out of the room for having questions and a differing opinion instead of just talking to her. OP is NTA and this man is suspish."
A third user wrote supporting the wife, "Unpopular opinion but NTA. No one died or is on life support from the sounds of it. No major surgeries. The brother has support. I would not expect my brother to cut his honeymoon short to come home - especially if i had several others helping me out. If someone had died, was near death or was severely disabled, it would be different."
There were a few mixed reactions from different users, with one writing, "I agree, but I find it very weird that according to OP her husband knows what is wrong and is refusing to tell her. She wants to call the hospital and see but he also doesn't want that. It would get me thinking what was going on tbh Edit: to clarify I think NTA or ESH", and another user disregarded some of the users who called the wife YTA, stating, "Why is everyone ignoring the fact that the husband is refusing to give her any info other than "they're fine but SIL has to stay in the hospital". Her husband is refusing to share important information. I can't imagine a reason for not giving your wife a proper update on injured family.
I'm more concerned with his behavior than OP's. OP think real hard about staying with someone who refuses to share information that would absolutely typically be shared with a spouse. The way he treated you when you didn't want to go along with his unilateral decision is highly concerning. NTA".