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‘Pro-LGBTQ’ parents stir debate for refusing to pay tuition for gay son warned of 'consequences' of coming out

The couple posted about the situation in Reddit's popular 'Am I The A**hole' forum
PUBLISHED SEP 21, 2022
A couple stirred a debate on Reddit after revealing that they weren't going to help their son pay his college tuition after his grandmother found out he was gay (Representational photo/David McNew/Getty Images)
A couple stirred a debate on Reddit after revealing that they weren't going to help their son pay his college tuition after his grandmother found out he was gay (Representational photo/David McNew/Getty Images)

A couple sparked online debate after revealing that they are going to stop paying for their gay son’s college tuition fees as his catholic grandmother got to know about his love interest and she is now insisting to stop paying his fees.

The family drama came into the public eye, after a Reddit user known as u/throwaway-37463782 shared the situation on the platform’s popular forum 'Am I The A**Hole.' In a post titled "AITA for refusing to pay from my gay son's tuition after he came out to his family?" a 40-year-old woman revealed that her 19-year-old son came out to her and her husband as gay when he was just 14. But they kept it a secret from his wealthy and catholic grandmother, who is extremely intolerant of gay people.

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"My husband and I are both atheists and support the LGBTQ+ community and were both proud of our son for coming out," the post read. "However, my husband's mother is a devout Catholic and is extremely intolerant of gay people."

The original poster said, her children were told that their wealthy grandmother is going to pay for their academic expenses only if they enroll in a private Christian or Catholic school. "She believes this will keep them from partying, having premarital sex, etc.," the post read. "I don't agree with this and have argued my children getting the best education possible regardless of the school's religious affiliation should be her top priority, but she refuses to change her mind."



 

She revealed as per the condition, her son is set to start the second year at a Christian college and the year has already been paid. But a storm came into their happy family life when her son’s grandmother got to know about his secret. The OP’s son recently returned to his home to celebrate the birthday of her grandmother, where he told his cousins about a guy he was talking to. Although he thought the secret was safe, his cousin told his parents who told another family member until his aunt and uncle outed him to his grandmother.

In response to the shocking secret, his grandmother called the OP to inform her that she will no longer be making payments toward his tuition and to relay the message to him that she will no longer be speaking to him.

“She is livid and called me and informed me she will not be making any future payments toward his tuition and told me to relay the message to him as she will no longer be speaking to him. I have told him many times not to come out to his grandma, cousins, aunt, or uncle until he was through college. I hate that he can’t be himself, but my husband and I cannot afford his college,” the post stated further.

Now, the OP’s son is forcing her to pay his college fees with the saving she made over the year. But they can’t pay for his college fees. The OP said she has explained that the kitchen is "falling apart" and that the cost even if they postponed the renovation, they would still be short on the costs of his private school.

Reddit users have flooded the comment section of the post with their opinions. While some defended the OP, some criticized her for her decision. “I think you hit the nail on the head here. Op and her husband never promised their children free education the grandmother did. and now he lost that but he's pissed at his parents because they won't cover it for him now. I hope that he eventually realizes that this wasn't his parents' fault any more than it was his and his grandmother is just a nasty person. NAH: wrote a user.

“I agree. It is a crap situation, but there are cheaper schools to attend for his final year. Grandma is and the rest of the bigot family members are such Ahs,” wrote another user.

The Original poster is yet to deliver further information about the family situation and their plans of paying their son’s college fees.

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