Woman breaks down the difference between rape and consent in 6 simple tweets
Twitter user Nafisa Ahmed decided to use the analogy of stealing money and likened it to the practice of consent.
Trigger warning: This story contains themes of sexual assault that some readers may find distressing
The discussion about sexual assault is not a hot topic that is only discussed when a brutal incident takes place. The conversation about consent is something that we should constantly engage in. Educating more people is vital because there are still plenty of individuals who are unable to tell the difference between rape and consent. It is a simple concept that has been explained in a variety of ways, broken down in the simplest words to get across to as many people as possible. Despite having the whole internet at their disposal, there are still people who choose to remain ignorant about rape and consent.
Women have been making the effort to explain what comprises rape and how to practice consent for years. Yet another woman decided to do the labor of explaining consent using a simple example. Twitter user Nafisa Ahmed decided to use the analogy of stealing money and liken it to how consent works. In less than a dozen tweets, she drew parallels between the two and painted a better picture of understanding consent.
I don't get how rape is so hard to understand for some men. But, if you put it like this, they get it:— nafisa "✌🏽🤏🏽🤏🏽" ahmed (@thatxxv) August 16, 2016
If you ask me for $5, and I'm too drunk to say yes or no, it's not okay to then go take $5 out of my purse... Just because I didn't say no.— nafisa "✌🏽🤏🏽🤏🏽" ahmed (@thatxxv) August 16, 2016
If you put a gun to my head to get me to give you $5, you still stole $5. Even if I physically handed you $5.— nafisa "✌🏽🤏🏽🤏🏽" ahmed (@thatxxv) August 16, 2016
If I let YOU borrow $5, that doesn't give the right for your FRIEND to take $5 out of my purse.— nafisa "✌🏽🤏🏽🤏🏽" ahmed (@thatxxv) August 16, 2016
"But you gave him some, why can't I?"
If you steal $5 and I can't prove it in court, that does NOT mean you didn't steal $5.— nafisa "✌🏽🤏🏽🤏🏽" ahmed (@thatxxv) August 16, 2016
Just because I gave you $5 in the past, doesn't mean I have to give you $5 in the future.— nafisa "✌🏽🤏🏽🤏🏽" ahmed (@thatxxv) August 16, 2016
If you can understand alllllll of that, how do you not understand the concept of rape?— nafisa "✌🏽🤏🏽🤏🏽" ahmed (@thatxxv) August 16, 2016
Ok, rant over. Times like this are good because it lets me know which men to avoid spend any time with or in the vicinity of.— nafisa "✌🏽🤏🏽🤏🏽" ahmed (@thatxxv) August 16, 2016
Another Twitter user added:
If I decided I'd give you $5 but changed my mind and you took it anyway you stole the $5— Playaoption (@playaoption) August 16, 2016
Thames Valley Police had used a similar approach to explaining consent, with the help of tea. Titled "Tea Consent," the video explained consent in terms of offering tea to a person. The animated video starts off by posing the question, "If you’re still struggling with consent, just imagine instead of initiating sex, you’re making them a cup of tea. You say 'Hey, would you like a cup of tea?' and they go 'Oh my god, I would LOVE a cup of tea! Thank you!' Then you know they want a cup of tea." The video continues, "If you say, ‘Hey, would you like a cup of tea?,' and they're like, 'Uh, you know, I'm not really sure,' then you can make them a cup of tea, or not, but be aware that they might not drink it.”
The video goes on to say, "And if they don't drink it, then, and this is the important bit, don't make them drink it. Just because you made it doesn't mean you're entitled to watch them drink it. And if they say, ‘No thank you,' then don't make them tea. At all.” The video then shows various alternatives like if they accept your offer for tea and later refuse it, or how you can't ask people who are unconscious if they would like tea so you should probably put the tea aside. It can't get simpler than that. But it is the system of men not holding each other accountable that aggravates into serious assault.
Often men resort to the defense of "Not All Men" when it comes to discussing sexual assault. A Harvard graduate named Evelyn who studied gender-based trauma explained how this is male "pick me" behavior. In a TikTok video that is now viral, she explained how it is a way men silence women's voices and feed their own superiority at the same time.
“To really move past victim-blaming, as a society we need to learn to empathize with victims and instead condemn the perpetrators,” Elizabeth Arif-Fear award-winning activist, writer, founder, and director of Voice of Salam told Bored Panda.