'Van der Valk' Episode 2 Review: Maddeningly cringy crime, narrative twists don't help plot from getting bland

With one more episode remaining of the series, we don't know how much it can do to even be deserving of the one-star we've decided to rate it
Marc Warren (PBS)
Marc Warren (PBS)

Spoilers for 'Van der Valk' Episode 2 'Only in Amsterdam'

The first episode of the PBS series was titled 'Love In Amsterdam' and made us wonder if cynical Inspector Piet Van der Valk's (Marc Warren) allure would somehow save this bust of a show? We were wrong. While all is fair in most productions whether it be 18+ material or appetite ridding gore, we don't think Episode 2's combination of a Muslim woman's dead body, mysticism, a lesbian Catholic nun (Juliet Aubrey), religious erotica and a cliched break up that Lucienne Hassell (Maimie McCoy) has to deal with, did anything positive for the series. With one more episode remaining, we don't know how much it can do to even be deserving of the one-star we've decided to rate it. Just to jazz it up, there are also identical twins and casual office gossip.

We don't know if it was the blatant need to be strangely audacious or the scriptwriters decided "maddeningly cringy" as a direction for the narrative but even though there is a dead body - a classic need for a script that runs off of a crime perspective - we were still bored. Just like 'Love in Amsterdam', there has been a murder - a woman this time, and Van der Valk's and his right-hand woman Hassell have to solve the crime that will make you want to turn away. Using the help of their resident pathologist - whom we can't stand and is an alcoholic - the duo and their team start a chase that brings too much into the narrative. In the last episode, we saw political drama, vile gaslighting and manipulation destroy a premiere, this week we give you medieval drama, spiritually advanced people, and drug facilities. If all this sounds like this is not something you'd watch on a weekend night in, you're absolutely right.

Last week, we had also wondered if Van der Valk's unapologetic attitude made him Amsterdam's Horatio Caine, but yet again all we were proven this week was that while he runs on an ego high and nonchalant charisma, his new assistant, Job Cloovers (Elliot Barnes-Worrell), seems to have a knack for actual police work. While we know that Van der Valk's respect for professionalism is low (he had slept with the criminal in the last episode), we wonder why make the titular character the one reason we don't want to watch the show? We get that a character filled with a dark void brings suspense, a hostility to communal knowledge, and develops a persona that audiences can invest in, but they really missed the mark on this one. Like we said before, two hours is already too long for a crime drama procedural - two hours of uncalled for narrative twists is torture.

Episode 3 airs on Sunday, September 27, 2020, at 9 pm EST and is titled 'Death in Amsterdam'. The synopsis reads: "An eco-fashion vlogger turns up dead during his video feed. Cloovers takes a special interest in the case, which uncovers a bitter rivalry between two firms dedicated to ultra-green clothing. Piet and Dahlman confront the vengeful son of a corrupt cop that they previously put away."

GET THE BIGGEST ENTERTAINMENT STORIES
STRAIGHT TO YOUR INBOX.

MORE STORIES

Season 6 of ‘Abbott Elementary’ premiered on October 7, and new guest stars are set to appear in upcoming episodes
3 hours ago
Linda Cardellini's ‘Crystal Lake’ Episode 1 pays tribute to a real snake killed during ‘Friday the 13th’ filming
5 hours ago
The adult animated series follows a celebrity escape artist who is pulled back into a war between Apokolips and New Genesis
5 hours ago
‘Chicago Fire’ Season 15 Episode 2 puts Stella Kidd (Miranda Rae Mayo) and Kelly Severide's marriage to the test after the latter's promotion
7 hours ago
‘VisionQuest’ introduces a young pickpocket from London whose past traces back to Westview and ties into ‘Agatha All Along’
7 hours ago
‘Chicago P.D.’ loses another original cast member as LaRoyce Hawkins bids farewell to Kevin Atwater — here’s how the show handled his exit
8 hours ago
Firehouse 51 prepares to say goodbye to a fan-favorite character after a warehouse fire left him with a career-ending injury
8 hours ago
Tatiana Maslany leads ‘MPG,’ a show about a newly divorced mother whose search for answers pulls her into a dangerous world of crime.
9 hours ago
'Chicago Med,' starring S. Epatha Merkerson, airs new episodes every Wednesday at 8 p.m. ET on NBC
10 hours ago
‘9-1-1’ Season 10 sends the 118 into a volcano emergency as Athena and Buck adjust to new responsibilities.
17 hours ago