HAVE YOU SEEN THEM? Expert reveals the 5 most ignored relationship red flags
PORTLAND, OREGON: A therapist has revealed five warning signs your budding relationship might already be going the wrong way. Jeff Guenther, from Portland, Oregon, has become a TikTok sensation thanks to his frequent shares about love and romance.
His most recent video, which he uploaded with his 2.5 million followers, discussed the details you could miss when you are head over heels in love. The love expert claims that a spouse who is constantly trying to "keep the peace" or is "overly reliant" on you can cause issues in the future. Captioning the clip, "Five red flags you're ignoring in the honeymoon stage," the therapist revealed what you should be looking out for.
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@therapyjeff 5 red flags you’re ignoring in the honeymoon stage. #mentalhealth #therapy #therapist #therapytok #dating #relationship #relationshipgoals #relationshiptips #datingadvice ♬ original sound - TherapyJeff
1. Overly controlling
The first red flag, according to Jeff, is being "overly controlling." He clarified that even though this could appear to be a "good sign," you should be careful if you come across it. "Don't mistake this [for] a good sign because they seem to be able to ask for what they want but really they are attempting to control who you spend time with or what you do," he revealed.
2. Possessiveness and jealousy
The therapist then shared his next piece of advice, saying that while we all want someone to be "obsessed" with us, it isn't always a good sign. Possessiveness and jealousy are major relationship red flags, according to Guenther. "How sweet does it feel when someone's obsessed with you? I guess it feels great but their insecurity issues might get out of hand, so keep an eye out," the therapist advised.
3. Lack of boundaries
Being devoted to your relationship is a given, but never establishing boundaries or separating yourself from your partner can make things sour. "Number three, lack of boundaries," Guenther said. "Feeling smothered can feel super loving, but also a partner that doesn't respect your limits or consistently pressures you to do things that you are uncomfortable with is not okay."
4. Evading conflict
The therapist said the fourth red flag to watch out for was avoiding conflict. Having an argument with your partner is not fun but it may be necessary, he pointed out. "While it's natural to want to keep the peace during the honeymoon phase, avoiding conflict entirely can lead to unresolved issues and resentment down the line," he explained.
5. Overly dependent
The last red flag you should look out for in the beginning of a relationship is extreme dependence. "Love the sense of need, but a partner who is overly dependent on you for emotional or material support may struggle with independence and personal growth," the love expert said.
'My ex in a nutshell'
Many viewers admitted they had missed the warning signs in earlier relationships as they thanked the therapist in the comments section. "I ignored all of these. Now I'm eight and a half years into a relationship and getting a divorce," commented one person, while another said, "Just summed up my last two relationships - I'm working on my issues. Thank you." "All five and I married him. I wish I never had," shared a third. One person added, "Ugh my ex in a nutshell." "I'm so glad you do these videos," wrote another.
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