Celebrity presidential cabinet: A peep into what President Ye's ministry should really look like
Whether Kanye is to keep his promise of “distancing myself from politics” or not, we are curious as to see which celebrities would make up the best cabinet for President Ye
The current political climate is not all that ideal for a major part of the population, with many upset at how President Donald Trump is running the country. However, he does have his fair share of admirers, one of the highest profile ones being Kanye West, at least until his eyes became “wide open” and he realized he had “been used to spread messages I don’t believe in.”
Spectators, nonetheless, took a second to actually believe it, because Ye has changed his stance a few times in the past and many are expecting him to be Trump's stan in no time. His criticizers are of the opinion that Ye may not be as innocent or gullible as he is portraying himself to be. In fact, he may have a photo of the Oval Office on his vision board.
After all, who can forget the infamous speech accepting the Vanguard award on the 2015 VMAs stage, where he announced his 2020 presidential intentions? Whether he is going to keep his promise of “distancing myself from politics” or not, we are curious as to see which celebrities would make up the best cabinet for President Ye.
President: Kanye West
No one is as thirsty to become the next commander-in-chief of the United States as he is. More importantly, can you even imagine how Kim Kardashian would revolutionize the First Lady image? No title or job profile is going to make Kim K cover up her curves and it definitely would be interesting to see her choice of clothes for diplomatic events. And, of course, she proved to be a visionary by saving non-violent drug offender Alice Johnson from her life sentence earlier this year. With this level of empathy and compassion, we can only assume how responsibly she is going to take this position.
Vice-President: Kris Jenner
There is no one who can manage a career better than the OG momager and after decades of handling her daughters' careers, it is only fair she is promoted to mom-in-law-ager aka vice-president.
Secretary of State: Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson
If you really want the rest of the world to pay attention and work closely and nicely with the U.S., you better have someone who is beloved worldwide and that person is 'The Rock.' He is super woke and has personality that can charm you any time, any place. With 'The Rock' as Secretary of State, we are sure to have the world dancing to our tunes.
Secretary of the Treasury: Kylie Jenner
First off, she has an insider connection, much like Jared Kushner and Melania Trump in the Trump administration, but more importantly she is a "self-made" billionaire. She definitely knows a thing or two about handling money, and I say we leave all our money for her to manage.
Attorney General: Joyner Lucas
If you don't already believe Lucas is a man who can see two sides of a coin, you need to head on over to his YouTube channel and watch 'I'm Not Racist' right now. This man knows the only way to co-exist in this country is to find a middle ground.
Secretary of the Interior: Shailene Woodley
Nobody is loving the planet more than her right now. She makes the most of everything she uses, including toothpaste and deodorant. She knows how to live without taking too much from nature. And, she definitely can teach us a thing or two about preserving our natural resources. And, in case you forgot, the 'Divergent' star was also arrested while protesting the controversial project at the Standing Rock reservation in North Dakota.
Secretary of Agriculture: Jennifer Garner
We have known now for a while that this Hollywood A-lister has a green thumb, but in the last couple of years, she seems to have found a few extra hours to dedicate to her passion. She, in fact, has an actual farm, where she farms and does farming with her own two hands. Need proof?
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Look, Mom, your farm has come to life! - 700 blueberry bushes - 50 fuyu persimmon trees - 3 cows 🐮(as grass management/pets) - 2 farmers 👨🏼🌾👩🏼🌾 (Uncle Robert & Aunt Janet) - 1 farmer wannabe = yours truly 🙋🏻♀️ At @onceuponafarm we take #freshfromthefarm seriously! That’s why you’ll find us in the dairy section of your grocery store and not the baby aisle. #soyouthinkyoucanfarm #growgrowgrow!! #geezihopewecanfarm #oklahomaandorganic
Secretary of Commerce: Ashton Kutcher
Okay, do you even know that Kutcher has investments in your day-to-day apps including Spotify, Airbnb, Fab, Dwolla and Uber? He definitely will know where to put the nations money wisely.
Secretary of Labor: Oprah Winfrey
In an ideal world would we want Oprah to be our president? Hell, yes. But this is the Upside Down we're talking about where Yeezy is the commander-in-chief. We could still make a little sense of it if 'O' were to take over as Secretary of Labor. There is no one in the country Oprah cannot make agreeable. "You get a whatever you want, you get a whatever you want. You get a whatever you want," and voila, no civic tension whatsoever.
Secretary of Health and Human Services: Jennifer Lawrence
No one is at as much a risk of hurting themselves as JLaw - there are entire YouTube videos dedicated to her falling down at various events. If anyone understands the importance of healthcare, it is her and some older lady could have done a perfectly good job of it, but let's be honest she's been stealing older lady roles since the day she hit puberty and why should this be any different?
Secretary of Housing and Urban Development: Miley Cyrus
She already has a foundation - the Happy Hippie Foundation - to protect the homeless LGBTQ youth of the country. ALSO, she bought an interim flat for one of her ‘The Voice’ team members - Janice Freeman - last year.
Secretary of Transportation: Vin Diesel
If the 8 'Fast & Furious' films taught us anything, it's that this guy knows transportation. Also, hello, his last [chosen] name is Diesel.
Secretary of Energy: Kevin Hart
Have you seen him not doing anything? He is in every single movie and manages to run marathons – imagine what he can achieve if he takes that energy conservation and redistribution to a grander scale!
Secretary of Education: Natalie Portman
When she was in Harvard, she smoked weed every day, she cheated every test and snorted all the yay. But the point is, she went to Harward and do we not deserve a Harvard educated woman in the cabinet?
Secretary of Veterans Affairs: Adam Driver
This is a no-brainer. Not only is he a former marine, he now travels around the world performing comedy for deployed officers. Who cares more about Veterans’ affairs?
Secretary of Homeland Security - Nicolas Cage
For obvious reasons. In deference to Mr. Cage I refuse to defend my choice further.
Trade Representative: Mark Wahlberg (or his agent)
Why? Well, basically for negotiating $1.5 million pay for the same project Michelle Williams got 0.7% of that for. *Read sarcasm and a middle finger for patriarchy*
Director of National Intelligence: Matt Damon
I only trust Jason Bourne with this job. Actually, I trust James Bond with this job, but since is too busy drinking martinis and being British, I’m looking at the next best thing.
Ambassador to the United Nations: Kristen Bell
Tell me you can look at her face and say no to anything. I challenge you. And, do we not want someone who gets the rest of the world to tell us yes? Plus, she is super smart, super kind and super woke.
Office of Management and Budget: 21 Savage
This brother stopped wearing bling to invest money in start-ups and cryptocurrency. If that man doesn't know how to budget, I don't know who does.
Director of the Central Intelligence Agency: Will Smith
Have you seen Uncle Will’s vlogs lately? Hella inspiring. If he can’t make Prez. Kanye listen to him, no one can and if this scenario were to come true, let's really hope and pray Ye does listen to him.
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Administrator of the Environmental Protection Agency: Leonardo DiCaprio
Have you been paying attention? DiCaprio made a documentary on climate change called 'Before the Flood' and even used his platform as Oscar winner to talk about the environment. We need to pay attention and we need to get him on to this imaginary cabinet.
Administrator of the Small Business Administration: Tiffany Haddish
She is a famously regular customer of Groupon and is now the face of the service. She cares about small businesses – and, cheap bargains – but mostly, small businesses.