Johnny Depp says his life is 'full of betrayal' as he opens up about depression and expensive habits

Johnny Depp's finger tattoo that once read 'slim' referring to his ex-wife Amber Heard has now been changed to read 'scum'


                            Johnny Depp says his life is 'full of betrayal' as he opens up about depression and expensive habits

Johnny Depp has recently opened up in a rare, candid interview and shed light on a lot of previously unanswered questions. The 55-year-old 'Pirates of the Carribean' star addressed his legal battles with his fiances and his over-the-top spending habit. 

As reported by Rolling Stone magazine, writer Stephen Rodrick was invited to Depp's rented mansion in London, England where he opened up about his complicated relationships with his close family and friends, and his severe battle with depression which was a result of both his personal and financial problems. Depp was very upfront about his drinking and smoking and, upon entering the mansion, Rodrick said he could feel his presence immediately. 

"Johnny Depp is at the hands of his personal chef Russell and appeared dressed like a 1940s gangster with jet-black hair slicked back, pinstripes, suspenders, and spats."

As he approached, Depp stretched out his right hand and his finger tattoo 'slim' which referred to his ex-wife Amber Heard had been changed to 'scum'. "So are you here to hear the truth?" Depp asked. "It's full of betrayal."

Amber Heard and Johnny Depp (Getty Images)
Amber Heard and Johnny Depp (Getty Images)

"Depp still possesses the fixating brown eyes that have toggled between dreamy and menacing during his 35-year career. He is here in the stogie-size joint left by the sink in the guest bathroom. He is here in the never-ending reservoir of wine that is poured into goblets. And he is here in a half-done painting upstairs that features a burning black house, a child Johnny and an angry woman who resembles his mother, Betty Sue," Rodrick wrote. 

My mom was born in a f**king holler in eastern Kentucky. Her poor f**king a** was on phenobarbital at 12," Johnny said. He definitely loved his mother dearly but claims that they moved about 40 times while growing up and she would frequently give him "irrational beatings". "Maybe it's an ashtray coming your way. Maybe you're gonna get clunked with the phone. It was a ghost house... no one talked. I don't think there was ever a way that I thought about people, especially women, other than 'I can fix them'," Depp added. 

Johnny Depp (Getty Images)
Johnny Depp (Getty Images)

"Betty Sue, I worshiped her," he said before adding that "She could be a real b***h on wheels". While attending her funeral in the year 2016, Depp recalls saying, "My mom was maybe the meanest human being I have ever met in my life." Depp went on to speak about his other siblings and shared that one of his sisters and her husband and her son moved to his mother's farm in Kentucky and were hired to manage and maintain the property but their spending was out of control. After his mother died, the family continued to live there. 

"Their thinking is that I'm going to take care of them forever and that the farm is now theirs. I didn't make that promise," Depp says. Johnny Depp had a close relationship with one of his sisters Christi who was a constant figure in his life and would also manage his day-to-day affairs. However, their relationship became extremely strained when she was opposed to his marriage to Amber Heard. "Depp’s last constant connection with the real world was severed," Rodrick wrote.

Heard and Depp started dating in the year 2012 and decided to get married in the year 2015 on Depp's private island in the Bahamas. The very next year, she filed for a temporary restraining order against Depp and claimed that "There was one severe incident in December 2015 when I truly feared for my life." Images of Heard showed that she had a mark on her eye and a cut on her lip from the alleged incident. 

Heard officially filed for divorce in 2016 during the month of May very shortly after Depp's mother passed away. Post his divorce with Heard, Depp revealed that he became severely depressed. "I was as low as I believe I could have gotten. The next step was, ‘You’re going to arrive somewhere with your eyes open and you’re going to leave with your eyes closed.’ I couldn’t take the pain every day," he said. 

He then went on a tour with his band 'The Hollywood Vampires' and also started to write a memoir on an old typewriter drawing inspiration from  Hunter S Thompson. "I poured myself a vodka in the morning and started writing until the tears filled my eyes and I couldn’t see the pages anymore. I kept trying to figure out what I’d done to deserve this. I tried being kind to everyone, helping everyone, being truthful to everyone," Depp revealed. "The truth is most important to me. And all this still happened."

Depp has had a history with drugs and alcohol and is not shy about it. While talking about his idol, Thompson, he regrets that 'quaaludes' are no longer around and recalls the 'quaaludes' he used to take. "They're made with just a little bit of arsenic or strychnine, so the high was far more immediate," he admitted. He then remembered how one time when he was high on quaaludes, he asked a bouncer in Florida to punch him for no reason. "You either wanted to smile and just be happy with your pals, or f**k, or fight," Depp said of being under the influence of quaaludes. 

Johnny Depp (Getty Images)
Johnny Depp (Getty Images)

Depp went on to speak about his over-the-top spending habit. Depp's former business associates resorted to filing a countersuit against the actor after the actor had filed a lawsuit in mid-January against 'The Management Group' and its associates for defrauding him and also mismanaging his money. The business associates, however, claimed that they warned him that he was spending $30,000 a month on wines flown to him from around the globe.

Depp, however, proudly admits that the actual amount was much higher than what his former associates had quoted. "It’s insulting to say I spent $30,000 on wine. Because it was far more." It looks like Depp's lawsuit against TMG is not going to reach an end any time soon. "I have never, ever been the bully kid in my life. I never went out of my way to hurt anybody. When I was a little kid, what I was taught was never start a f**king fight, but if somebody f**king tags you or starts invading your f**king world, finish the f**king fight. To my mom's exact words, 'Lay them out with a f**king brick."

Johnny Depp (Getty Images)
Johnny Depp (Getty Images)

Earlier this month, many fans became concerned after photos of him in Russia showed him looking extremely unwell. However, a source shared with ET, "Johnny is healthy and is enjoying his time on the road with his band".