Woman sexually abused by father developed 2,500 personalities to cope with trauma
Jennifer Haynes, who was just four when her father Richard Haynes started abusing her, recently came face-to-face with him at Sydney's Downing Centre District Court
Jennifer Haynes has always had anger towards her father Richard Haynes and had always wanted to "smack" him for his actions.
However, since she believed she wasn't in a position to do so, she created 33 personalities to do it for her.
Jennifer, who has over 2,500 personalities, recently came face-to-face with her father at Sydney's Downing Centre District Court.
"I'm not chickening out," she said after seeing her father, reported Yahoo.
Richard had pleaded guilty mid-trial in March to dozens of counts of rape, buggery and indecent assault committed against his daughter in the 1970s and 1980s.
The assaults started when Jennifer was four and continued till she was eleven.
Even though Richard pleaded guilty, Jennifer noted that there weren't enough words "to do justice to the enormity" that she had suffered all those years.
"Vile, extreme, sadistic, inescapable, unavoidable and overwhelming" were some of the words that she chose to describe him.
At the court hearing, she looked at her father and said, "Scum."
Jennifer recalled that there were countless times when she had begged her father to stop.
"He heard me beg him to stop, he heard me cry, he saw the pain, the terror he was inflicting upon me," she said in her statement. "He saw the blood and the physical damage he caused and the next day he chose to do it all over again. My dad's abuse was calculated and it was planned."
She recalled that her father made her feel less than a human and constantly made her think that she had no value.
She noted that the sexual abuse she witnessed as a child was one of the root causes for her to develop more than a thousand personalities. Some of these personalities were a means for her to cope with the abuse.
These included personalities like "Muscles" and four-year-old "Symphony", who were two of the 33 identities she embodied when she appeared in the court to give evidence.
"All the other alters have done their job so well and kept Jenny alive," she said. "When Dad nearly killed us physically, Symphony removed the alter who was almost dead and replaced them with a fresh alter to keep going."
Jennifer wants her father to pay for the crimes he has committed and said that Symphony is "still in the chrysalis phase because we haven't got justice yet".
"Symphony will get to be a butterfly at long last," she said. "I can't wait to see him be led away (and) taken down to jail."
Jennifer carries with her a permanent colostomy bag which she described as a "degrading, daily reminder" of the crimes that were committed by her father.
"My dad stole my glasses off my face every time he wanted to abuse me," she told the court. "He took away my eyes and held them hostage. Whenever I cannot see or my vision is impaired, I panic and am plunged into flashbacks."
Due to the assaults that Jennifer had suffered, she is now scared of things such as birthdays, relationships, men, bathrooms and even enjoying food.
Her father had told her that her mother would "spontaneously combust" if she were to ever tell her about the abuse.
"He implied she would drop down dead," she said. "He expanded my concept of 'telling' to include any kind of demonstration of pain, fear, terror or discomfort."
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