Are the Bernie bros back? Here's how to spot one during the upcoming election season
With Sanders' kicking off his presidential campaign, expect to see these unauthorized "mascots" taking to the streets in their crusade against the capitalist brigade
Bernie Sanders commenced his 2020 presidential campaign on Saturday with an emotional homecoming speech at Brooklyn College in New York City. After all, he was born in Brooklyn to working-class immigrant parents before he went on to complete his undergraduate study at the institute.
But while good ol' Bernie hopes you #FeelTheBern once again as he hits the usual notes on social justice, economic inequality, or the beautiful chandeliers in Moscow, a certain species may once again be spotted on the streets of Brooklyn -- or for that matter anywhere where the Vermont senator has a sizeable following, after being in hibernation for almost three years.
Well, of course, we're talking about the Bernie bro.
"Online agitator. Millennial misogynist. Leftist know-it-all clothed in self-righteousness and also some sort of stupid hat. Have you seen this man?" Ellen McCarthy once wrote for The Washington Post, soliciting help to find an individual who fits the description.
As the 77-year-old senator kicks off the sequel to his 2016 presidential campaign, the unauthorised mascot of the Sanders campaign is probably preparing to let out a primal scream to announce his return to the campaign trail.
The Bernie bro, predominantly male, just cannot wait to unleash his questionable manners and mob mentality in his crusade against the capitalist brigade.
While some consider the Bernie bro to represent the senator's most fervent supporters, others argue that he is just a myth. Nonetheless, he has managed to draw ire even from the Sanders camp, which has desperately tried to dissociate itself from this character while trying to figure out how to fund universal basic income.
The Bernie bro's age ranges anywhere between 25 to 35, and you can trust your gut if he sports a carefully unkempt facial hairdo.
Going a step further, McCarthy says one can be confident "that a Bernie Bro will always smell of last night’s home brew. He’ll wear a gray pullover or a horizontally striped tank top."
And you know you've hit the jackpot if the placard-wielding gentleman is wearing a fleece-lined cap with ear flaps (instead of a tin-foiled hat).
While you can rest assured that the Bernie bro is already #FeelingtheBern, he wants you to feel it too. After all, Sanders' policy proposals might just change the country - and the Bernie bro has just posted a video on his Facebook wall about it.
The Bernie bro is highly impressed with Sanders while debating with fellow Democrats, no matter how much he dissuades the media from focusing on Hillary Clinton's emails. All he knows is that your non-support of Bernie makes you willfully ignorant.
The Bernie bro is highly conflicted while juggling between explaining how feminism saved his life, and at the same time balking at affirmative action to bring about gender economic equality as it doesn't treat the sexes equally.
What he is cocksure about, however, is that Bernie has a real shot at securing the Oval Office.
When asked why the Democratic party would ever find resonance with the masses nominating an actual Democratic socialist, after trying to explain for years together how its healthcare policies aren't in sync with those of Sanders', the Bernie bro stutters.
But then again, the Bernie bro highlights how America will not sustain without implementing Sanders' idealist, highly principled progressive policies — and it doesn't matter if they never see the light of day.
Furthermore, he supports a $15 minimum wage and free college education for all, failing to explain how those policies once implemented will be funded.
With that said, the Bernie bro wants you to #FeeltheBern as well, or at least until his renegade champion drops out of the race once again, or makes it to the White House against all odds.