3 reasons why 'Stay At Home Girlfriend' trend on TikTok is problematic

Women's financial independence is threatened by the 'Stay at Home Girlfriend' trend that romanticizes rigid gender roles
PUBLISHED APR 19, 2023
Stay at Home Girlfriend trend is getting viral on TikTok (@haleyybaylee/TikTok)(@kendelkay/TikTok)
Stay at Home Girlfriend trend is getting viral on TikTok (@haleyybaylee/TikTok)(@kendelkay/TikTok)

The 'Stay-At-Home Girlfriend' trend on TikTok depicts a 'day in the life' of largely young girls who stay at home while their boyfriends work. On the surface, it appears to be a healthy lifestyle, complete with morning walks, wonderful meals, workouts, light housework, and cooking. While the trend may appear innocent at first glance, it brilliantly highlights how the power structures we are still fighting against in our society operate. This trend is not as glamorous as it may appear. In fact, it's quite problematic.

A large number of videos have included the hashtag #stayathomegirlfriend. And in many of these videos, the creator will take viewers through their daily routine of being a so-called stay-at-home girlfriend. 

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Who started this trend?


@kendelkay

cooking and cleaning are my favorite acts of service 👩🏼‍🍳🫶🏼

♬ original sound - kendel kay

 

Kendel Kay, a TikTok influencer, posted a "day in my life" video showing what she does as a "stay-at-home girlfriend." The trend quickly grew and, just like any other viral TikTok trend, within 24 hours it had flooded everyone’s For You page.

Why this TikTok trend is problematic?

Here are 3 reasons why these videos are problematic.

Their entire lives revolve around their boyfriends

Many of these women are constructing their entire existence around their boyfriends and their needs. Their daily objective is to make their home and appearance more appealing to their male partner. The stay-at-home girlfriends are usually young, attractive, and skinny who practice self-care, and are ultimately valued for the amount of household or self-care tasks they can accomplish in a day.

The trend may also impact younger generations

These videos have millions of views, and these creators have thousands of followers and are likely to impact a lot of young girls. Teenagers might see these videos and emulate this way of life. Due to a TikTok trend that depicts women as trophies, they could also unavoidably find themselves in a world of emptiness.

The trend isn't as fulfilling as they portray it on social media

The “Stay at Home Girlfriend” trend is a concerning trend that threatens women’s financial independence and romanticizes rigid gender roles. This trend encourages women to forget their own career ambitions for the sake of their partners. It can also lead to an unhealthy relationship dynamic where one partner has all the power and control. Ultimately, this trend reinforces oppressive gender roles and reinforces the idea that a woman's worth is only in her ability to be a supportive partner.

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