'Sleep deprivation is no joke': Internet supports man who refuses to wake up for his crying baby
SAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA: Internet users are staunchly supporting a dad who refused to disrupt his sleep by waking up at night to care for his newborn child. The 28-year-old man, who goes by the username u/Scary-Razzmatazz-195, explained that he and his wife Katie, 25, welcomed their first baby about 3 months ago.
The father said sleep is very important for him as he is an athlete and Katie is a stay-at-home mom. “I can’t be waking up multiple times throughout the night and be sleep deprived. Katie and I talked about this before trying for a kid, and I told her that I can’t compromise my sleep for anything short of an emergency,” he wrote in a post on Reddit’s 'AITA' forum. He expressly told his wife that he wouldn’t be waking up to her crying baby but suggested that they hire a night nurse.
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‘I’m still not waking up during the night'
The OP (original poster) said things were going smoothly until Katie got tired and became distant. "She was quiet for a while, then finally mentioned that it’s extremely unfair that I’m not helping her at all with the baby during the night. I acknowledged that she has been working hard and not getting much sleep, but we also previously agreed to this arrangement," the father further stated. Katie has declined to hire a night nurse to assist as she doesn't trust a new babysitter to monitor their child alone throughout the night.
"So we’ve been at an impasse. She still doesn’t want to hire help, and I’m still not waking up during the night," the OP stated. He offered additional information and stated that they have hired a maid to clean their house and also have a meal delivery service that makes a majority of our food. "So I’m not just dumping tons of housework on her. Katie doesn’t have a problem with the maid being around the baby because she’s known her for a while now. We’ve also been going to regular doctor and therapist appointments, they don’t think she’s suffering from postpartum," he continued.
‘She isn’t too overwhelmed’
In an update post, the father said he and Katie have decided to hire a night nurse to help her during the day so that she can develop trust in her and leave their baby with her. "She also apologized for lashing out at me and explained that she was mostly too embarrassed to ask her family for more help when she already has hired help as a stay-at-home mom. So we agreed to ask my sister since they have a really good relationship," the man noted, adding, "My sister has offered to come by 1 or 2 nights per week to watch our son until Katie’s comfortable having the night nurse be full-time and alone."
The OP also stated that he is a professional baseball player and his season officially starts in late March with Spring Training in late February so he won’t be home much because of the travel schedule. "So that at least gives us a couple of months to get comfortable with a night nurse/nanny so she isn’t too overwhelmed," he concluded. The father’s post has garnered immense social media attention with many users supporting him and giving some important advice
‘It’s SO hard in the beginning’
"NTA I thought this would be the normal story of the wife doing all the baby stuff, cooking, cleaning, etc. But you have a maid & food service so she mostly just does the baby stuff. And seeing as how this is the only thing you’ve told her plus giving her multiple solutions," one user wrote, while the second user said, "NTA. I'm never a fan of anyone who agrees to something, then decides to be angry at someone else for their decision. Especially when other options are offered."
"‘Normally I’d side with Mom 100%. It sucks being the only one getting up with the baby, been there and done that twice. With my first, we had a similar understanding. My husband worked early mornings in a field where sleep deprivation was not only unsafe for him, but everyone involved. Was I a bit salty? Yes," the third user said. However, there were some users who slammed the father. "NAH. I absolutely sympathize with your wife, I do. It’s SO hard in the beginning. Give her some grace-sleep deprivation is no joke and can totally change a person (temporarily). Is there maybe even one night a week you can help? An off-season where you can help a bit?" another person asserted.
This article contains remarks made on the Internet by individual people and organizations. MEAWW cannot confirm them independently and does not support claims or opinions being made online.